SHREK APPROVES THIS CORPORATE BULLSHIT

Shrek Approves This Corporate Bullshit

Shrek Approves This Corporate Bullshit

Blog Article

Listen up, your little minions. The green giant himself, that swamp-dwellin' ogre, has given the thumbs green light. Yeah, you heard that right. All this corporate fluff is officially sanctioned by the man himself. So quit whining about those mandatory brainwashing sessions and smile because Shrek thinks it's all great.

  • Making money
  • Employee exploitation
  • Toxic workplace culture

Shrek doesn't care. He's just happy to have his castle filled with merchandise. So go ahead and suck it up, because Shrek is watching.

This 9-to-5 Grind Makes Me Feel Like Shrek

Let's be honest, sometimes work feels like you're stuck in the swamp with a grumpy ogre. That boss is constantly demanding more, and the fellow humans are about as helpful as a flock of dolphins. You just want to scream into the void "like Shrek!".

Between emails flooding in like an angry mob, you're starting to feel like your soul is slowly being eaten by a giant spider. You just need a good ol' fashioned ogre nap, preferably on top of a mountain of delicious gingerbread cookies.

  • Maybe you should embrace your inner ogre.
  • Life is too short for spreadsheets and boring meetings

Swamp Life and the 9 to 5: Shrek's Story

Let's be honest: office work is a drag. Your days are packed with meetings, and your boss is probably a total {jerk|pain|nightmare. You dream about being outside from it all, maybe even living in a swamp. That's where Shrek comes in. This big green dude knows the score: swamp life beats office grind any day. He gets to relax with his buddies, eat some delicious bugs, and escape all those pesky humans who are always asking him to take a break.

What Shrek Teaches Us

  • Every now and then you just need to chill out
  • Not all situations are created equal
  • Friendship is more meaningful than a big paycheck

HR Tried to Tell Shrek About His “Attitude”

Listen up, ya bunch of fairy tale rejects! Word on the swamp is that Big Green himself, the ogre we all know and love as Shrek, has been acting kinda "weird" lately. Turns out, HR got a few complaints about his “boorish” behavior around the office. Now, I ain't sayin' Shrek should start wearin' ties and sippin' tea with the princesses, but maybe a little less ogrification wouldn't hurt? Maybe try smilin' at Donkey once in a while? Just somethin' to "think about” .

Anyway, HR called Shrek into a meeting and tried to give him some “pointers”. But let’s be real, talkin' sense into an ogre is like tryin' to teach a dragon to knit. It just ain't gonna happen.

  • Maybe Shrek should take a few swamp yoga classes? Just sayin'.
  • Maybe HR could offer him free onion donuts? You know, for his troubles.
  • Maybe Donkey should just start avoiding him altogether?

Farquaad's in Charge, You Get Me?

Listen up, ya bunch of fairytale rejects! Let me explain somethin'. This whole ogre situation? It ain't about me. That pint-sized dictator Farquaad!. He thinks he's the big cheese, but I'm tellin' ya, he's just a puppet master with a nasty case of inferiority complex.

He whimpers about ogres and dragons while he plots to rule every last kingdom. Meanwhile, I'm stuck just tryin' to shrek live my life.

He wants to boss around every fairytale creature, but that just shows how weak he really is! He needs us to feel secure, but all he does is make things worse!

Here's the real deal: why are we letting this little man play king?

I'm Out Here Living My Best Shrek Life (But at Work)

Listen up, 'cause I'm about to spill the beans on my super work life. It ain't always a fairytale, but sometimes it feels like living in that swamp with Shrek and Fiona! Yeah, you heard me right - it's all about embracing those ogre vibes, even when you're stuck in a cubicle prison. You gotta find your inner Donkey, you know? Be goofy with your coworkers, spread that good karma, and never forget to wear those green jeans on Fridays!

It's all about finding that balance between slaying the dragon of deadlines and chilling like a true ogre. After all, who doesn't love a little bit of swamp life?

*Just don't tell my boss I said that.*

Report this page